FINAL BLOG: Wrap up & Reflections

FINAL BLOG: Wrap up & Reflections –

Wrap Up

I wrote my last blog on 11/4 at about 1pm, after we arrived and celebrated on the beach in St. Augustine.

Heather and I explored town, and the major highlight for me was the statue of Ponce de Leon & the Grilled Cheese Gallery. As a student, I loved history and was especially fond of the early explorers of North America. About a week before riding into Florida, I recalled that Ponce de Leon was chasing the Fountain of Youth when he discovered Florida and only then made the connection to my own chasing of that fountain. I loved that we both had the same terminal point, and thought that was pretty cool. What I didn’t remember nor see in my trip planning, was that St. Augustine is home to the Ponce de Leon Fountain of Youth Archaeological Park. You can actually buy a souvenir bottle, and fill it with 2 ounces of Fountain of Youth Spring water from the actual Floridan aquifer. Heather, who thinks half of what we have in our house is clutter and can probably teach Marie Kondo a thing or two about organizing and tidying, thinks I am a pack rat. I am far from one, but compared to her, who isn’t? Anyways, in my efforts to now practice a new minimalism, I refrained from going to this attraction and gift shop and buying a hokey souvenir. This is a baby step of progress in decluttering. Besides, I had spent nearly 7 weeks chasing that fountain and had found it all on my own.

Mark & Ponce de Leon – both chasing & finding the Fountain of Youth in St. Augustine.

After the bittersweet moment of shipping our bikes home from a local shop, we enjoyed a lunch of comfort food, truly extraordinary grilled cheese, prepared by food artists so its aptly named the Grilled Cheese Gallery.

A most moan-worthy final lunch

A menu by artists, and earns my highest endorsement!

We enjoyed a delicious dinner at the Gypsy Cab Company with wonderful companions Alan & Michele, as well as Casey who was a stranger who encountered us on the beach and befriended us and helped us celebrate there and on our final night. Just one more example of strangers becoming friends. A huge shout out of thanks to friend Dave O. for this dinner gift at his brother Frank’s fantastic restaurant!  We are so grateful to Alan and Michele for making the 4 hour drive up to St Augustine and for Alan reaching out to me 5 weeks earlier. Their presence added so much to our concluding ride and day. I imagine it would have been empty and lonely without them.

Dinner celebrating with Alan, Michele and our server/hostess Alanna (absent in photo is Casey photographer & new friend)

We flew north on Delta from Jacksonville, where we had one final memorable trip moment that must be shared. I’m not sure how to phrase it, so let’s just say on every Delta flight, I develop a “Mark-style” relationship with the flight attendants. It begins with me schmoozing with them and sharing how much I absolutely love the Delta cookies. Hopefully you know those tasty Biscoff Cookies served in twin packs with cinnamon and other spices that make them so popular. We boarded still in bright colored tee-shirts, each toting 2 paniers as our carry-on luggage items, and wearing our helmets as they don’t fit in the paniers. We still stood out for conversation. As I boarded, I told one flight attendant how we just finished riding across the country and how for over 6 weeks, I was so excited to know at the end I would have Delta cookies as a treat. She laughed with me (or at me?) and we proceeded to our seats. An hour into the flight, the snack cart came around and that flight attendant handed the woman on the aisle, by now our new friend Rebecca, a single pack of cookies. She then gave Heather 4 packs and me 4 packs, to our delight. Rebecca sort of griped to the attendant: “Really? They get 4 and I only get one?” The attendant smiled, and said “Yes, they earned it”. We all had a laugh.

1 for you, 4 for you, and 4 for you

About 20 minutes later, the flight attendant returned with a gift for me. I was in shock and literally laughed to the point of tears.

Delta gift to me of a shrink-wrapped 16-pack of one of my snack favorites

She also brought Heather & me two minis of Jack Daniels. Since Heather was not interested, Rebecca and I enjoyed a toast to our new friendship!

Rebecca & I toasting – to life!

While visiting Matt at college, along with our 2 older daughters Sydney & Jamie, we enjoyed 3 bike-less and blog-less days. We had no restaurant reservations, and it didn’t matter! Previously, reservations would have assumed importance to me – making sure we had “good times” to eat in “good places”. I couldn’t care less now. I told my family that I could have been fine eating beef jerky (as steak) at a Chevron gas station mart. They did not think it was funny, even when I repeated it a second and third time. Sometimes my humor flops. At least Jamie often consoles me by applauding the risks I take at trying to be funny. The weather was cold! It didn’t matter. In fact, when our 3 kids all ordered shakes at night when we stopped for a post-game casual bite, how could I possibly not join them, despite me already being cold? The funny thing is they are not normally milkshake drinkers; I don’t ever recall all 3 having a shake together like this. Had I subconsciously influenced them?

One final shake before returning home- maybe the sweetest of them all by virtue of my drink mates

By the Numbers

If I think of the trip by the numbers, it barely tells the story, but offers a snapshot as follows:

• 85,070’ of accumulated elevation gain (sum of Strava counting)
• 85,070’ of accumulated elevation descent per my own simple logic of going from sea level to sea level, it must all balance out, or another way of saying what goes up must come down.
• 2,970 miles on Strava (not sure how that differed from my previous count of 3,100 miles)
• 72 miles average per riding day
• 65 miles average per travel day when including 5 rest days
• 46 days from San Diego to St. Augustine
• 41 riding days (missed being a biblical number by 1 day too many)
• 13.33 milkshakes (the 0.33 fraction was the finishing of Heather’s shake as I waited vulture-like at Sparky’s)
• 10 nights WarmShowers: 8 nights with hosts, 2 in absentia- now that is trust!
• 9-0-1, my final record with dog chases; although after I saw the German Shepherd bite Glenn, I was tempted to reclassify the tie with Rusty the galloping Setter as a win for me and call it 10-0.
• 8 flats (we think that is the count)
• 5 rest days – if you call doing 28,000+ steps rest, on 2 of the 5 days
• 4 packs of Flipz pretzels – far lower than I had forecast
• 2 falls, 1 each early on
• 1 cactus run over by Mark on day #9
• 0 flats for Mark – I genuinely prayed aloud every single day for my tires since the day I ran over that cactus! Heather did not pray for hers. Need I say more?

Reflections

It is now Wednesday 11/10, 6 days since we rode our bikes into St. Augustine and celebrated the end of our coast to coast cycling odyssey. I thought that nearly a week of elapsed time would allow some perspective on what this ride has meant to us, but while I have gained a bit of detachment, I already know that we won’t fully realize its impact on the two of us for a while. With that caveat, here are some preliminary thoughts.

My initial brief summary on 11/4 reported elation, relief & sadness at the ride’s completion. Elation was definitely short lived. There was definitely a feeling of euphoria, but there is possibly even more sadness at it being over.

For now, my sense of accomplishment and enrichment covers:

1. The physical ride itself and overcoming many challenges to actually complete it;


2. The fundraising success – my initial goal was $7,500 and after the initial hour and a handful of responses, I knew I had aimed too low, so raised it to $10,000 and after achieving that goal in 10 days, raised it to $15,000. I am thrilled that we climbed to a present tally of $21,408 that includes $2,100 corporate matching gifts not yet shown online. And the count is still rising. I love seeing additional donations still coming in including the following one: My older sister who lives in the Boston area came to NY on Monday as a surprise to help us celebrate. While walking yesterday morning, we saw two sticks of gum wrapped completely in their still shiny silver foil on the ground. They must have been dropped mere minutes earlier. I offered her one as a joke. She turned it on me and said I will pay you to eat them. (Clearly some reversion to our childhood roles or maybe we just have not matured much since childhood?) Always negotiating, I countered with if you donate $100 to the Reeve Foundation, I will eat them. And voila, another $100 donation was achieved 😊 Thank you to everybody else who donated, with fewer demands of me, only requiring that I bike 3,000 miles! Donations may still be made at https://allstars.funraise.org/fundraiser/mark-segal


3. Speaking of which, the Reeve Foundation has already given me so much. It added purpose to and significantly enriched my ride, opened doors to new friendships, and I hope for a continuing relationship.


4. Completing the blog! In our initial conversation with Ken, we discussed how at night one is so tired that it’s really difficult to maintain a blog but at the end it’s great to have for the memories. (Reminder: Ken is in our initial backstory blog, the friend of a friend who had ridden cross country 7 years ago and gave us the confidence we could do it on our own.) Similarly to how I wrote in an early blog that I started sharing my goal of riding across the USA with friends about 2 years ago, as making a goal public adds accountability to complete it, that is one reason I shared that I would blog regularly. A year ago, I tried to blog on a monthlong road trip of National Parks and quickly stopped. It was way too exhausting after Heather and I hiked, biked or drove all day. I failed to complete that goal. I’ve always enjoyed writing and wanted to test myself as a writer, so this time making a public commitment forced me to follow through. Another reason for blogging was I felt in asking for donations, I wanted to give something of myself in return. I am beyond thrilled with the outcome. In addition to Heather and me having a personal account that will help our own memories live on, we also got to share this with friends, families, colleagues and, unexpectedly, complete strangers. I have been touched by the many comments people have shared with me and pleased to learn how it did inspire additional donations. With all that said, in writing publicly, I was conflicted. I like privacy and trying to fly under the radar. I don’t have a Facebook account. I played a bit with Instagram to see what it was all about and then stopped after a grand total of 24 posts, last one over 4 years ago. I have tried to teach our kids re social media to climb the mountain so you can see the world, not so the world can see you. So this whole public account was a leap for me, a risk that I am glad I took. It has been a growth opportunity.


5. We have met so many wonderful people, made new friends, and have grown through these new relationships. The kindness of so many to go out of their way for us reaffirms belief in humanity.


6. Back on day one, when climbing from San Diego and near the town of Alpine on our way to Pine Valley, CA, we were blessed by our water angel Bruno. As a reminder, he saw us roadside while we were deciding if we should add 3 miles round trip to go back to Alpine to load up with water that would be necessary for the remainder of that day. He told us to wait there as he drove home and returned with water and electrolyte powder. What I previously didn’t mention, as I didn’t want to be presumptuous or cast a jinx on us, is that as Bruno bid us farewell and good luck, he wisely said: “whichever way your marriage is heading, this ride will just accelerate that pace”. We both feel and are happy to report back to Bruno that this 46 day adventure, has enriched and accelerated our closeness, friendship and love of over 30 years.


7. I knew this journey would cover many story arcs, including Heather’s and my relationship, but I had not at all expected a spiritual aspect. That may have been the biggest surprise, and has been a wonderful bonus and something for me to explore more of going forward.


8. The biggest life lesson for me seems to be the following. In preparing mentally for the trip, I figured that of 50 days estimated travel, 10% (5 days) would be miserable and 90% (45 days) would be great. I was preparing for miserable days of weather, getting lost, mechanical failure or other reasons. What actually transpired was that every day was actually great (with the exception of one day to NOLA with 3 flats and 102 miles in heat & humidity) but many of these great days still had a component of misery. And even the one day of misery had some greatness. Unlike my pre-trip expectations of days being one or the other, kind of black & white thinking, the reality was very different. Through conversations, I have learned this is much closer to the reality of people facing chronic medical conditions including paralysis and the many collateral issues. There can be some misery every day, yet there is a decision of sorts of how to confront or live with that and choose to overall live positively and see each day as a gift and great.

 There are so many lessons from the road, here are just a few:

• You need so many fewer things than you really think you need- travel and live light;
• BUT on the other hand, don’t be a weight weenie! If you really need and value something take it with you, a few pounds won’t make a difference.
• There is a time to stay in the narrow lines (boundaries) like a shoulder of the road or the slick black line down the chip and seal road;
• BUT there is a time to go outside of the lines and zig-zag as you traverse up a steep slope and cross over the yellow line.
• It doesn’t matter how little progress you make towards a goal, as long as you advance. Some hours you advance in only hundredths of a mile and other moments leap forward in chunks of 10 miles.

Before departure, I thought about wanting to experience this trip fully with all of the five senses. How did that go? Taste for sure was more than satisfied. I was determined to have no regrets in this area and think I achieved that. The blog is already replete with examples, enough said. Sight was also completely experienced, and blogged about with the added dimension of losing my daily glasses. Smell? I can still recall the aroma of a bakery, the odor from carcasses of dead animals and the whiff from riding past fertilized fields. The sounds I recall from the trip include birds, cars & trucks whizzing by, my tires on the road, my gears grinding when needing tuning, and the wind roaring.

I deliberately left sense of touch last. I had a mixed relationship with touch. On the one hand, I recall being fascinated by the contrast of how my handlebars felt burning hot after leaving them in the searing sun for 2 hours while I napped inside Chick-fil-A, compared to how cold they were to the touch first thing in the morning when I left my bike outside in the mountains of  New Mexico. I loved feeling a breeze on my arms. But there were many times, touch was a very negative experience. My right hand was often sore from pressure on my hand grips, and probably exacerbated by writing a blog from an iPhone, typing old Blackberry style, with my thumbs while lying in bed trying to remain awake. And touch was a near constant hurdle feeling the skin issues from saddle sores from the significant time sitting on a bike seat. It was not lost on me how pressure sores are a major medical issue for those with spinal cord injuries, often leading to infection and in fact death. There were times I tried to block out my sense of touch so I would not experience the discomfort and then I felt guilty doing so as I thought a person with paralysis would gladly change places with me to feel pain. It was a complicated sense for me.

While we enjoy a great sense of accomplishment and enrichment, the sadness at it being over is significant.

On the simplest level, there is the physical withdrawal adjustment. With such fully active days, we were releasing a great amount of endorphins and other chemicals that positively affected our brains. Since I’ve never been addicted to a drug (not counting the chemicals in diet coke or sugar at various times of my life), I don’t know what going cold turkey is like, but do feel withdrawal. In the past, when sitting at a table, I would often have my leg bounce up & down with energy in need of an outlet. This had not occurred over our near 7 weeks away. My leg is bouncing as I type this.

How do we all of a sudden cut out 2,000 calories and unlimited sweets from our daily diets? I gained 2 pounds just yesterday – possibly all those Delta cookies.

While visiting Matt at college this past weekend, after eating breakfast in the hotel, Heather commented that without her paniers, helmet, and cycling attire, nobody came up to her with curiosity to ask about her, where she’s coming from, going to, etc. The random people encounters and meaningful interactions are also gone or much, much harder to create. As I have walked around town and the supermarket, people are just not as friendly, greeting strangers.

We feel like kids who return home from summer camp, who lie on their beds, missing everybody and everything in camp, and needing time to adjust back. My friend Danny, an incredibly accomplished endurance athlete of Ironman races and Ultramarathons including The Leadville Trail 100 (a 100 mile run), wrote it best to me yesterday: “The commitment which once felt so consuming, all of a sudden is so missed.”

We miss everything about the adventure.

We owe gratitude to so many people!

• To Ken who gave us confidence to go for it on our own without a group. Amazing how much impact came from that one conversation.
• To Stu & Jacques for joining us for a day of riding and gave us a shot in the arm.
• To our kids Sydney, Jamie & Matt for your support, love, request that we text you every day when we safely finished our ride, letters of inspiration delivered with Stu; and to Sydney for posting all my writings and photos on this blog.
• To all our Warm Showers hosts.
• To our family, friends, colleagues and indeed strangers who supported us and the Reeve Foundation.
• To the Reeve Foundation for adding meaning to my ride and Alan & Michele for celebrating with us in St. Augustine.
• And lastly, to Lenny & Ernie – I was doing this ride anyhow, and said I would be thinking of your strength of character for daily inspiration. Thank you for your positivity in the face of adversity as an example to help me reach my goals.

After Heather and I said goodbye to Matt Sunday afternoon, and to Sydney & Jamie who had a different flight, we were alone the two of us walking on a gorgeous, sunny fall day through the Nichols Arboretum full of trees with fall colors. It was our final hour of travel before heading to the airport for our flight back to NY. We came upon a guy (looked like a student) sitting on a bench in a secluded area, and heard him playing guitar and singing the most appropriately perfect song to capture our mood and that gave Heather goose bumps (normally it’s me who gets mushy like that). You know the song. It’s been used for so many graduation video montages, end of summer camp videos, including the first promotional teen travel video I made over 20 years ago, and even the final Seinfeld soundtrack.

Yes, it was Green Day’s Time of your Life -  formally: Good Riddance (Time of Your Life). You can hum along.

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable
But in the end, it's right
I hope you had the time of your life

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time
Tattoos of memories, and dead skin on trial
For what it's worth, it was worth all the while

It's something unpredictable
But in the end, it's right
I hope you had the time of your life

Chorus repeats x2

Time of our life! (Note tan line on hand)

Heather and I indeed had the time of our life! (or is it lives?)

Thank you to everybody who encouraged and supported us at any stage, and to those who have already welcomed us back easing this transition home.

Thank you for reading along, allowing me this pleasure of writing for others.

Mark

© Copyright Mark Segal 2021